About Me
I was a young graduate student when I woke up one morning and watched the twin towers fall. I remember all of the feelings I had throughout that day–anger and fear, bewilderment and deep sadness, gratitude and relief. That night I was supposed to meet a newly married couple for their first therapy session. I was certain they wouldn’t show up, but they did, and I couldn’t believe what happened. They started right in to tell me about what seemed to me to be minor quibbles–the toilet seat, the toothpaste, the travails of learning to live together. I remember thinking, “don’t you know what happened today? Do you understand how small these complaints are in the context of the terrible things going on in the world?” But as I sat with them, I realized that they were bringing their own raw experience to me. These issues consumed them as they worried about their future as a couple. It wasn’t my job to judge it. It was my job to make space for it and to provide some hope as we worked together to improve their situation.
I spent the first two decades of my career working with adolescent and young adult clients and their families as they navigated some of the most challenging moments of their lives. I had the opportunity to work in various roles in this process, to supervise and instruct young therapists and to emerge as a leader in my field. During that time, I was also busy living my own life and having experiences that guided me toward this specialized private practice.
After the birth of my daughter in 2016, I had some medical complications that made it impossible for me to have more children. I noticed that I was experiencing two seemingly contradictory emotions–sheer gratitude and joy to be a new mom when I wasn’t sure that would ever happen, and utter grief at the loss of the possibility of a sibling for her. I also noticed that when I would start to feel the grief, the words “but at least” would come into my head, urging me to lean away from the grief and focus only on the gratitude. It wasn’t the first time in my life that I had this experience, and I started to analyze this phenomenon, both internally and socially.
Since that time, I have become a breast cancer survivor and have witnessed losses in those close to me related to addiction, infertility, divorce, career changes, faith changes, complex medical and mental health diagnoses, and many other life-altering experiences that lead to significant grief. As I began to research the topic more, I found that there is a lot of information about grief as it relates to bereavement after the loss of a loved one, but not a lot about these other kinds of grief.
In the last decade, I have spoken on this subject at various events around the country and always found so many people looking for support with exactly this type of grief. I decided it was time to build a practice around supporting people who are grieving. Drawing on years of training and experience, informed by my own complex journey, I look forward to providing you with empathy and support wherever you find yourself and strategies and support to find the way to live joyfully in a world where your loss remains.
